Two Weeks Worth

Dearest Super Koala,

I am sorry that I have not posted in two weeks. I just completely forgot about it last week. However, I hope you realize that on Monday, you will have six pages due in order to catch up to me.

The first page was pretty easy. I was instructed to make a treasure map. I was at first just going to make a really cool looking map that served no real purpose, but then I decided to actually “bury” something. Bury is in quotations because I didn’t really dig up the ground and put something in it, rather I hid objects in our basement. Now that I think about it though, that is just as good as burying something.


So the map is a layout of the basement and in three of the rooms I hid a different object. In the laundry room there is a container full of bouncy balls, in the bedroom there is a ball of yarn, and in the back room there is a painted box with rocks inside. All three objects are completely out of plain sight, so I consider that buried.

For the next page, I had to collect something from every place I went out to eat that week. We only went three places, and I wasn’t very good at remembering to take something, so I guess it was a good thing I didn’t post last week. Otherwise, this page would have been very boring.


On Sunday, we went to Jo Boccardi’s; I had pizza. My object is the paper they use to keep the silverware wrapped up. However, I forgot to take this with me. Luckily, Frailey’s, where we went on Tuesday, has the same color wrapper, so I just took two from there. Finally, on Thursday, I had White Castle’s. I was going to cut out the logo on the bag, but I forgot about that and had to settle with a piece of napkin. To supplement for my lackluster items, I drew pictures of what I had in order to jazz the page up a bit.

On the next page I was supposed to write notes to myself that I would want to read in ten years. I couldn’t really think of anything to write, so instead I just wrote a bunch of cheesy motivational phrases in fun fonts to fill up the space. I think it wound up looking pretty cool.


Finally, I had to drip wax onto a page. I got very impatient waiting for enough wax to melt, so I wound up with very little to work with. It was my plan to make a smiley face all along to go with my motivational sayings, I just had less wax to work with than I would have liked. But, I guess that is my own fault for getting antsy. Nonetheless, I think he is pretty cute.


That’s all I have for these past weeks. I hope I will be more punctual this coming week.

– Captain Spazzmataz



AMLP: Super Post Part 2

Captain Spazzmataz’s Thoughts:

  • P. 310 – Miles might be my new favorite character. If he is not, he is a close second behind Leonard. He is just so great and nice.
  • P. 312 – Wow. Lilly is super dramatic.
  • P. 316 – I just feel like they have only really known each other for about a month, maybe less, and I think these feelings of love are a little premature.
  • P. 319 – I don’t understand his obsession with being able to look into his eyes. It is not like when you look into your eyes your entire life runs like a slideshow. I get the whole concept of you have to be able to look yourself in the eyes and accept what you see, but I am tired of reading about it.
  • P. 322 – I thought their argument was going well, but then all of a sudden it got super intense! It was kind of scary.
  • P. 332 – Well that ended very depressingly. I thought with all of the hype surrounding the fight that they were going to watch it. It is so depressing to finally hear that they can’t.
  • P. 334 – No. Not now. This is going to be so sad.
  • P. 337 – Why didn’t they run!? Are they stupid? Now everything is ruined. Also, I totally guessed it. Something bad did happen.
  • P. 341 – I really don’t like when he uses this style of writing. It is just so choppy and doesn’t really make any sense.
  • P. 345 – Yay! Go James!
  • P. 347 – Yay! More good people!
  • P. 349 – What is happening? He knows something that I don’t.
  • P. 352 – Okay. I get it now.
  • P. 352 – I don’t think it is the best idea to have a rehab center so close to an abandoned building filled with addicts. It seems like a bad combination to be. Also a bus station that is crawling with dealers seems like another bad idea. They obviously didn’t pick the location all that well. How are people trying to stay sober supposed to when they have to leave from a bus station that wants them to mess up?
  • P. 353 – Well I guess he passed that test that he wanted to put himself through.
  • P. 358 – That turned out much better than I thought it was

This section was probably my favorite so far. It was interesting, tense, and James is done being a baby. The book as a whole is much better now that he isn’t so whiny.

Super Koala Thoughts:

  • p. 310 – Oh, I miss Hank.  And I just love the way Miles speaks.  So very eloquent, even coming through the James Frey conversation generator.
  • p. 311 – Jesus, this is what she was upset about?  I guess it got easy to see Lilly as a reasonable, healing person.  Obviously not the case.
  • p. 313 – Lilly is more of a nutcase than I realized.  The psychiatrists are so right; two people this unstable have no business trying to form a relationship.
  • p. 317 – I guess this is a cute moment they’re having, but it’s all so worrisome.
  • p. 318 – Leonard.  Still scary.  Still adorable.
  • p. 320 – Who is this Bobby person?  And the guy that came back.  Shouldn’t they be focusing on improving themselves?
  • p. 321 – This story is horrifying.  The people telling it are horrifying.  I am so pro James punching them both.
  • p. 324 – Leonard is so incredibly, awesomely horrifying.
  • p. 328 – This is my nose wrinkled at very false feeling conversation, which is really just a monologue from Frey fused with more humble bragging.
  • p. 335 – I just feel like Lilly has formed this dependency on James really quickly.  You’re in a treatment facility with rules, and you can’t make these extraneous demands that jeopardize the other person.  That is not a healthy or supportive form of love.
  • p. 340 – As bad as this situation seems, it’s really positive that James says he needs to be there.
  • p. 342 – Miles is like a delightful and sympathetic superman.
  • p. 346 – This behavior is so exhaustive and irrational.
  • p. 347 – HANK IS BACK.
  • p. 349 – What is wrong with this bathroom?  Who is this guy?  What are we doing here?
  • p. 351 – Where is Leonard when you need him?
  • p. 354 – I am so confused by this location.  Is it some sort of mystical, run down crack hotel?
  • p. 355 – Well, Lilly hasn’t taken to this whole sobriety thing very well.  Precisely why they shouldn’t be in a relationship together at all.  Both people need to be stable.
  • p. 356 – This is terribly cute of Lincoln.  James needs to give people more credit.

This section was a lot to deal with.  James’ was impressive in his actions, though his attitude about how well he’s doing occasionally grates on me in this weird way.  I don’t know.  More than anything, I am once again so appreciative for the supporting characters.  I really feel like they steal the story of this book and keep it worthwhile.

1001 Movies: Robocop

From the bed of Captain Spazzmataz:

I have very mixed feelings about Robocop. First off, it is a really great idea. The plot was actually enjoyable which made for an entertaining movie, and some of the scenes were really cool. I especially liked when they were creating Robocop, and the viewers see things through his eyes. Really any part where the audience was seeing as Robocop, I enjoyed. However, because of the age of this film, some of the effects really took away from the overall movie quality. The E.D. 209 robots looked almost like Bob the Builder style animation when they were moving, and the cartoonish effect that had really detracted from how cool it could have been. Also, for how gory this movie is, they could have done a better job with the bloody special effects. Really, in general, they could have cut some of the gore out. It wasn’t really necessary.

I only have two problems with the plot. One, they didn’t do a very good job of erasing his memory. If that was their goal, they totally failed. Someone who has had their memory erased should not have dreams regarding their past. And second, if bad guy bullets don’t even faze Robocop, then why do the cops bullets put holes in his armor? Their bullets aren’t different, so why is the damage so drastically different? Oh, and I couldn’t stop picturing Clarence Boddicker (played by Kurtwood Smith) as Red from That 70s Show.

Overall, a pretty good movie. 3 stars.

Super Koala Thoughts:


That aside, the journey that was RoboCop was an odd one.  For some reason that I just don’t know, I thought Arnold Schwarzenegger (spelled right on my first try, what what) was the RoboCop.  Like, I swore this was one of his movies.  I dunno.  But I do know that I perpetually waited for Ah-nold to emerge in all his RoboCop glory, and that distracted me throughout the beginning of the movie.  This disorientation only deepened when I realize my beloved Red Foreman was a bad guy.  And I just never recovered.

Independent of my own incorrect preconceived notions, I thought this movie was delightful.  It’s so funny and satirical, which I was just not expecting at all.  I love the integrated commercial and TV segments, and the general naming of the products.  6000 SUX, An American Tradition.  Hilarious!

The storyline also went deeper than I thought it would, complete with a few twists and turns.  Nothing too dramatic, which given the Robo suit, I felt was good for the movie.  Unlike Spazz, I was very pro the obviously fake and excessive gore.  For me, it added to the satirical feel.

Overall: Super pleased, would watch again.  4 stars.

1001 Movies: Airplane!

From the bed of Captain Spazzmataz:

This movie was absolutely ridiculous. I don’t really believe that it should be on this list at all. I don’t think that I needed to see it before I died or really at all. I am pretty sure I would have been fine if I went through life without seeing this movie.

First off, they opened with the airplane flying through the clouds to the Jaws theme. How incredibly cheesy is that? That should have been my first indicator that this film was going to be a struggle, but no, I was still hopeful. I guess all of the stuff that I found incredibly annoying was incredibly hilarious in 1980, but I just didn’t get it. I am very thankful that humor in movies has progressed. Also, Robert Hays broke my number one rule and talked to the camera. I hate it when actors do that. I am not apart of the movie, just a spectator. Don’t include me. Also, everyone is super creepy. The old people are creepy, the children are creepy, even the fake people are creepy (probably the creepiest of them all!). And, the special effects are really bad. In the dance scene, I could see the strings holding him up, and when Captain Kramer was driving, the green screen behind him was soooo obvious. Finally, the random shirtless lady that popped up during the panic was just uncalled for. It didn’t need to be in there, and the movie definitely would have been better off without it. I am really just so surprised that this movie is on the list. However, I am glad we got it out of the way relatively early.

I can only give this movie 2 stars.

Also, this movie should not be rated just PG.

From the Bed of Super Koala:

I second my seester’s surprise that this movie scored a PG rating.  This must be a fairly common reaction though, as the students to whom I showed Young Frankenstein could absolutely not believe that it was also rated PG.  What a wild and crazy time it was.

Possibly unlike my seester, I understand why this movie is on the list.  I can understand that it is supposed to be hilarious, and I did find myself amused at the spoof elements.  Part of this might come from the fact that I watched it with Sparhawk, and this is exactly his type of humor.

The only problem for me is that this just isn’t my type of movie.  I feel the same way about this movie as I do about the vast majority of comedy movies, with exception given to the incomparable Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls.  And I really just can’t explain why I love that movie so much.  The random, obnoxious, and slightly gross just aren’t typically for me, and thus it always was.

That being said, I seriously love the name puns.  No shame.  3 stars.

Long Overdue

Dearest Readers,

It is I, Super Koala.  It has been quite some time since the Spazz and I wrote a conventional post.  The past few weeks have been filled with lots of time together, and we’ve been busy actually doing things instead of writing about doing things.

That being said, we thought it’d be nice to reconvene and summarize what we’ve been up to lately.  For personal posterity.  I wasn’t sure how far back to start, and the Spazz is presently unreachable somewhere abouts Colorado.  So, this will likely be rather disjointed.

In late March, the Spazz spent a week at mah hizzouse and we had many lovely adventures.  This included dinners, fish fries, puppy expos, and trips to Silver Dollar City.

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After Spazz went back to St. Louis, Sparhawk and I traveled to St. Louis for an extremely special occasion.  However, we began with a trip to the St. Louis Zoo.  If you’ve never been, I highly recommend it.  It’s pretty excellent, and it’s completely free.  I took a lot of pictures, particularly of monkeys and birds.  The highlights are posted below.

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Somewhere in there, we had the below Starbucks “Happy Birthday” beverages.  THEY WERE DELICIOUS. They deserve a picture.


Onto the main event!  The reason we went to St. Louis was for a Bo Burnham show.  I shall perpetually measure time, we decided, as a pre- and post- Bo Burnham.  Kind of like B.C.E.  The show was most extraordinary.  We had front row center seats, and were promptly blinded by the very bright staging.  My favorite thing about a Bo Burnham show is that he makes me think.  Sure it’s comedy, sure it’s amusing, but above all, it’s intellectual.  I’m still ruminating on some of these sprung thoughts.  Life goal completed.  Spazz and I got shirts not pictured below.

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The weekend after that, I traveled to St. Louis without Sparhawk and without puppies.  The occasion was for Easter, but as Spazz and I both have April birthdays, mine being the day after Easter, we did some pre-celebrating.  I was terribly excited to give Spazz her birthday present, which was a travel-sized record player along with Maroon 5’s new album.  This became extra perfect as the album is the same colors as the record player I picked out.  I had no idea.  The present went off very well, in my opinion.  Despite some incredibly vague hints I had dropped, Spazz had no idea, so the surprise was most successful.


After initial presenting, I discovered MamaBird had made me some most excellently awful Avengers cakes.  They tasted delicious, but weren’t incredibly pretty.  Nonetheless, chocolate cake is chocolate cake, and it’s the thought that counts.  I also received some delightful presents in the form of grey, polka-dot Vans from Spazzmataz and new Sperrys from my parents.  My feet are so well adorned.


While we were together, and before the Easter celebrations, we decided to accomplish a post card task.  As I had received multiple pairs of shoes, and was wearing my new Vans, this option seemed perfect.


Before we headed out for an evening of musical delight, we fastened our badges to our clothes.  Spazzmataz adjusted hers to reflect her birthday gift.  If you can’t read it, it says “Ask me about my record player.”  We each had three people ask us about our respective badges; fortunately, none of them were strangers.  I almost always hate talking to strangers.  And, we got to see our friend’s band play.  Their name is Koa, and they were really good.  Check ’em out.

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That’s all for now!  Hopefully the Captain of Spazz will assemble some sort of Colorado post upon her return.

Aaaaand, terribly cute Annabelle picture below!  I missed my girl.


Timely A Million Little Pieces

From the Bed of Captain Spazzmataz:

Here goes nothing. Another reading session of A Million Little Pieces.

  •  161 – What is his strange fixation on being able to look into his eyes?
  • 162 – Matty seems like such a pleasant  person! (Not really)
  • 166 – I also agree that asking the same question over and over isn’t going to get him anywhere.
  • 167 – Aw. The sexual ninja is leaving.
  • 169 – This is such a touching moment.
  • 171 – What happened? He was doing so good just a minute ago.
  • 175 – Introduction of Miles Davis. Not the trumpet player but the clarinetist/judge.
  • 178 – Isn’t James technically a fraud too? I mean maybe this Rock Star is embellishing his story to make a point. Isn’t that exactly what this entire book is? It is just Jame’s story super overly embellished.
  • 180 – Once again a very nice ending to a chapter.

I really liked this chapter. James went through many emotions but never seemed to be too whiny.

From the Bed of Super Koala:

  • 162 – I always get so apprehensive when new characters are introduced, but I already feel like it’s pretty legitimate with this Matty fellow.
  • 163 – Alright, maybe not.
  • 164 – I just love Hank. Joanne, too. I’m really glad someone in the book properly acknowledged how awesome the Bald Man had been for sharing.
  • 166 – I feel like Ken doesn’t really understand how to interact with someone like James.
  • 167 – I in no capacity understand how sexual ninja John is allowed to leave the program. He legitimately tried to trade his daughter to James because he upset him. How can he graduate a recovery program?
  • 170 – I find John’s self awareness on the issue largely comforting. Also, I’m going to miss Warren. He was really great.
  • 173 – I really like Lilly, but it always feels like she’s about to get him in trouble.
  • 176 – Miles seems very pleasant.
  • 178 – I find this rant on lying most ironic given Frey’s own truth stretching history.

This was a nice section. I’m definitely enjoying the book now that Frey has had his revelation. I’m also liking the characters and moments of humor laced through all of the seriousness. I hope that the close of this chapter can mean Frey has finally found something to latch onto, as nothing else presented has seemed to resonate with him as much as the Tao.

A Million Little Pieces: 144-160

From the Floor of Captain Spazzmataz:

The Koala and I are once again reading over Skype to trudge through A Million Little Pieces. Here goes.

  • 146 – That must be the best company ever to pay for rehab four times
  • 148 – I have a feeling his psych evaluation didn’t go so well
  • 148 – I was right
  • 152 – I always imagined Hank as a really old guy. I guess I was wrong. Also, it just shows how great he is that he convinced the facility not to throw James out.
  • 154 – Why are the other guys being so mean?
  • 160 – I am hoping that means that he will stay.

I was kind of confused a little by this section. All of the events seemed so separate from each other that it didn’t really make sense that they went together. But I guess it was a pretty good section again. Nothing too gruesome happened.

Super Koala Thoughts:

  • p. 144 – Coffee is such an easy job!
  • p. 146 – I find Ed and Ted to be notably disturbing. I also find all these lectures to be very impressive. The facility must work very hard to make sure there is someone available to speak to them twice a day.
  • p. 152 – Man, Hank is awesome even when not directly involved in the events of the book.
  • p. 153 – I’m already feeling incredibly sad about this bald man thing.
  • p. 155 – I was right. This moment has made me thoroughly dislike all of the treatment people. Except Lincoln. And Leonard. He’s still okay.
  • p. 157 – OTTER!

I, once again, like how this chapter wrapped up in a positive way. I hope his acceptance of his treatment continues. As much as I still don’t care for the main “character,” this book his helped refresh my knowledge of the strength rehabilitation requires. The side characters, like Joanne, who have been sober for sixteen years are completing a terrific task that takes strength and determination every single day. I definitely think that is really awesome and something worth reflecting upon.